For those in long term/married relationships - FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
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post #1 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 11:06 AM Thread Starter
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For those in long term/married relationships

Is there another girl/boy that you knew or had a relationship with that you wish you were with now? Not that you don't love the person you are with, but sometimes you wonder or want to be with the other person.

There was a girl in college for me, awsome, super cute, we were good friends, but she had a boyfriend, there was something between us, we both knew it but no moves were made (cause of the whole boyfriend thing). Then i got a girlfriend senior year and we just stayed good friends from then on. Don't get me wrong, i love my girlfriend and we are going to get married. But, sometimes, man i wish i was with the other girl.

is that wrong? anyone else get that?


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post #2 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 11:12 AM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

Yeah I get it. I wondered for a long time what it would be like if I stayed with my ex, but once I got engaged I realized I have it so much better now. I realized how much more I would have to put into that relationship to get anything out of it.



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post #3 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 11:25 AM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

I'm married. Do I want to get with other girls? Helllllz yeah. Would I ever? Nope. But that's a different story..My wife is the only one I'd ever want to be with in a relationship and I could not imagine life without her. If you don't feel this way about your girl..don't marry her. I sometimes wonder what happened with ex's but the though doesn't stay with me for long because in the end what difference does it make?
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post #4 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 01:01 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

ask your self this.....do you really love this girl that you are planning to marry?

If the answers is YES, then do yourself a favor and vanish all your thoughts about the "could've, would've, should've". lust will always be a part on everyone's minds. it's nature. HUMAN nature. It's how you deal with it matters.

If the answers is NO, then end it while you still can
(knowing that there's no kids involved). Regret always comes in the end.

- You know what excites me the most about life? Death. It's definitely 100% pure, unbiased, certain, & undeniable climactic phase that will literally takes your breath away. The anticipation is killing me.
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post #5 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 01:28 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

Yeah that just never really goes away, well unless you've only ever dated total losers in life.

I love my wife very, very, very much, but I still think about other women occasionally. I call it 'the grass is always greener' complex. Trust me, everyone has that complex. It is human nature to always wonder if another option is better then your current one. This applies to many things outside of just a relationship.

I'd certainly never leave my wife, well not unless she gave me a damn good reason (like burns the lasagna again, Woman get back in my kitchen and cook it right!!! I kid I kid).
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post #6 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 01:35 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

[quote author=azazel1024 link=topic=156143.msg3325642#msg3325642 date=1253035731]
I call it 'the grass is always greener' complex. Trust me, everyone has that complex.
[/quote]

Exactly. Anyone who says they never think similar thoughts is a liar.

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post #7 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 01:49 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

[quote author=azazel1024 link=topic=156143.msg3325642#msg3325642 date=1253035731]
Yeah that just never really goes away, well unless you've only ever dated total losers in life.
[/quote]

Ooh! Ooh! I resemble that remark!! Hell, even the soon-to-be-ex-wife is kind of a loser!

Now there were plenty of women I wished I could be with instead of her, but none of them were ever actually involved with me at any time


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post #8 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 01:59 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

Oh, and lest it not be obvious, you should never ask for or accept relationship advice from me.

Also, if you're going to live together before marriage, just make sure it happens AFTER you get engaged--living together before engagement makes it just seem like the natural course of things, which maybe it shouldn't be. You think "oh, since we're living together already we might as well make it official because it would be way too difficult to go our separate ways now." Trust me, you think it's difficult now, wait until you've been married 3 years and you actually have shared property

Oh, and that's one piece of relationship advice you can and should take from me. Because I already made that mistake and now recognize it as such


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post #9 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 03:18 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

Agree to post above. Lived with my ex and it caused us to break up. Long story short, we were both to comfortable to make things work. Now that we no longer live together, we are trying to make things work at a much slower pace. I had some growing up to do and I did it while we were apart. I dated another girl and she dated another guy. Nothing came about of who we dated, so we are slowly working through our problems. It's not an easy process at all, and at times I wonder if I'm making the right decision. The human mind always wonders if the grass is truly greener on the other side.

For my experience it was greener, but it died a lot faster. I saw some things from that grass that I didn't like. I would think I got rid of the crab grass, and then it would come back thicker then ever.

LMFAO "oh i thought i didn't need that" i bet in your head you were like "go kick your mom in the ass for me when you get home " 08mazda2.0
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post #10 of 24 (permalink) Old 09-15-2009, 03:22 PM
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Re: For those in long term/married relationships

Let me tell you a little story *wait I can't tell you because of the terms of my divorce*

If you have enough doubt in which you want to at least 'find out' do it before you get married bro. Don't put her through that. I can tell you from experience, after I was put through it, I would have rather have known on the day of my wedding, than after the fact that they didn't want to be there...


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