I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends - FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 02:49 AM Thread Starter
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I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

Well, I'm not normally the one to be emo, but fuck it, everyone has their moments.

So, I've had the same 3 friends since about 4th grade. We did pretty much everything together, but when we got to high school, things started to change. Somewhat. We were all trying to figure out what we wanted to do for college and whatnot, and I ended up rooming with one of 'em for my first year of college (BIG mistake, living with someone and being their friend are two COMPLETELY different things), and that experience put some serious strain on our friendship. Not to mention that we all went to different schools, too. But now, ever since I moved, the other two friends haven't been doing shit to keep in touch. I mean, moving was completely against my wishes, but it was over my head. But whatever. I recently went home and gave all 3 of them numerous calls, with the intentions of hanging out, but they all just blew me off, only to claim they had something else going on, or they were hanging out with their g/f's, or were 'going to call me back when they got home', but never did. I've recently noticed, too, that they are becoming closer with each other, hanging out more and more, but yet haven't made any effort to come see me, or hell, even send a text message or pick up the phone and call.. It just really sucks after everything we've been through, and I'm not exactly the one to make friends easily, since I have a hard time trusting people (I've been fucked over way too many times). I haven't been able to settle in here for shit, either, I've made some friends, sure, but it's just not the same. If anyone has experienced this, and has advice, please chime in. It's getting to the point where it's depressing me, and I'm usually a happy-go-lucky kind of guy. I mean, it's bad enough that I can't see my g/f at all (just did, and it was a month and a half of being separate before, odds are I won't see her again until school starts), but my best friends, now? The only thing keeping me going is work and my car, and we all know how motivating work is.

Any help would be appreciated, I could really use it.

Thanks,
Kyle
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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:04 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

I was in a similar situation where all my friends ditched me because of who I was dating.. I'm happy as ever though even without them because I have my girlfriend and that's all that matters to me.. Maybe you need a girlfriend that you can count on seeing more often so fill that void in your life!


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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:08 AM Thread Starter
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

Being with her isn't the issue, though. We've been dating for over 2 years now, and it's been, by far, the best 2 years of my life. When we are going to school, she is only 2 hours away, roughly, so seeing her isn't too bad. She's planning on transferring to my school after this year, too, so once that happens, it'll be perfect.

And I've met two friends at school who seem to be great, I'm actually going to live with one of them next year, so we'll see how that works out. It's just hard to accept the fact that I might be losing them. If there is one reason, and one reason at all, of why college sucks, this is probably it. It takes you away from your old life, and throws you into a new one, leaving things behind that you aren't ready to let go.
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:14 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

I can't believe.. this could be.. the end... it looks as though.. you're.. letting go

Sorry.. your thread title brought back some old "No Doubt - Don't Speak" memories.. Well hopefully after your girlfriend moves to join you everything will change.. I know a lot of people who are perfectly fine with just their significant other.. It's usually someone who will always be there for you and are less likely to disappoint you.. Most people think "Bros before hoes" but I think they haven't found the right woman for them (; I've had many friends come and go, but the wifey is here to stay!


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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:16 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

Try not to let it bother you. I'm sure things will work out for the best, whether that means your friends will come back to you in time or even finding new friends altogether. Just make sure to keep your own priorities straight, take care of yourself, and everything else will just work out. I've had friends come and go, but the BEST ones are still around. Even with them, however, there have been periods of time where we just took a break from hanging out for whatever reasons. Unfortunately you really can't expect anyone to be there for you all the time, especially if you're needy, judgmental, or have a habit of complaining and/or being a source of negative social energy so to speak. Not saying you are, but that is a common cause.

Good luck and don't worry about college. College will expose you to so many things and people that you will inevitably change. You have your current mindset as a reference, and you'll start experiencing things and questioning yourself... hopefully for the better. By the time you graduate, you will appreciate the person you have become and the people in your life because you'll have a more solid idea of who you are and why. But don't forget, above all, that you don't need any specific friends to function. If that is holding you back from getting your work done and achieving your goals, then there is a problem.




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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:19 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

[quote author=3AndMe link=topic=82011.msg1530613#msg1530613 date=1183274207]I've had friends come and go, but the BEST ones are still around. Even with them, however, there have been periods of time where we just took a break from hanging out for whatever reasons. [/quote]

Couldn't have said it better.. the REAL friends will stick around for the long run.. if they have no interest, they're not your real friends! Oh, and then there's the annoying friend who will only call if his girlfriend's busy or if he's all of a sudden single.. :grrr:


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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 03:21 AM Thread Starter
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

[quote author=aznkid.com link=topic=82011.msg1530612#msg1530612 date=1183274097]
I can't believe.. this could be.. the end... it looks as though.. you're.. letting go

Sorry.. your thread title brought back some old "No Doubt - Don't Speak" memories.. Well hopefully after your girlfriend moves to join you everything will change.. I know a lot of people who are perfectly fine with just their significant other.. It's usually someone who will always be there for you and are less likely to disappoint you.. Most people think "Bros before hoes" but I think they haven't found the right woman for them (; I've had many friends come and go, but the wifey is here to stay!
[/quote]

I was waiting for someone to pick up on the title. 10 points to you

[quote author=3AndMe link=topic=82011.msg1530613#msg1530613 date=1183274207]
Try not to let it bother you. I'm sure things will work out for the best, whether that means your friends will come back to you in time or even finding new friends altogether. Just make sure to keep your own priorities straight, take care of yourself, and everything else will just work out. I've had friends come and go, but the BEST ones are still around. Even with them, however, there have been periods of time where we just took a break from hanging out for whatever reasons. Unfortunately you really can't expect anyone to be there for you all the time, especially if you're needy, judgmental, or have a habit of complaining and/or being a source of negative social energy so to speak. Not saying you are, but that is a common cause.

Good luck and don't worry about college. College will expose you to so many things and people that you will inevitably change. You have your current mindset as a reference, and you'll start experiencing things and questioning yourself... hopefully for the better. By the time you graduate, you will appreciate the person you have become and the people in your life because you'll have a more solid idea of who you are and why. But don't forget, above all, that you don't need any specific friends to function. If that is holding you back from getting your work done and achieving your goals, then there is a problem.



[/quote]

Remarkably well stated, and I do appreciate the kind words, guys. I am coming to realize that my g/f is and has always been there for me, and with that, I'm starting to get the feeling more and more that she's 'the one'. I know, I'm only 19, and don't know anything, blah blah blah, but when you know, you know. And I think I do .

I jokingly called one of them out on it online, but they have yet to respond. I'm curious to see how they take it, though, and that was my main reason for doing it. Should be interesting to see what happens...
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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 10:38 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

yea i gotta agree with 3AndMe. life aint easy and distance kinda does that. ur situation is kinda like me and my bestfriends. we grew up 2gether since the 3rd grade but since high school we kinda drifted apart. it bums me out but i know it'll work itself out. and i dont really agree with azn im sorry but i wouldnt rely on a g/f. this may be the girl you marry but you never know, g/f's dont last forever. you should work on somethin more solid like other friends or family. idk just my opinion
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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 11:11 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

half my friends have moved away or do not care anymore, the other half are not my friends anymore

the best ones still contact me, as was said

life has a way of filtering out spam... trust me

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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 07-01-2007, 11:18 AM
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Re: I Feel Like I'm Losing My Best Friends

yea i had a best friend in korea,
as time goes on, you drift away from each other..
its okay.
you can make new friends.
just try to keep it at a level where you wont get screwed over if your nervous.
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