totally embarressing but i got guts! - FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #1 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:12 PM Thread Starter
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 9,518
totally embarressing but i got guts!

might as well see what others in the world say..

so, like.... lemme just spill it out. and what should i do?

so like there is this korean girl ive been trying to go out with, she has said no to like every guy who has asked her out, and sometimes i think she doesnt want a bf yet.
but like, ive taken her out on a date already, to a big city shes never been too, and seems like she really enjoyed it. we went to the mall, eat, hang out.
she knows i like her, her friends know i like her

we talk on the phone kinda long, like 2 days ago, it was 2 hours.. wow. i never really liked to talk to girls on the phone that long, but with her its fun.

one day something totally out of the ordinary happened..
like unexpectedly, we are in the back of her sisters car (not what you think, we cant eat in the library, but we're on campus), so she was feeding me japanese food with a fork, but like spoon feeding it to me, even after i refused? was neat, and fun.

all my friends thought that was not normal, and ive never seen that unless i was going out with a girl.

It seems i got the best chance of being with her out of every other guy, but then..

i ask her to the movies yesterday..
she says okay, but then... when she walks outside, her brother is with her.
ummm.............................................. ................................................
okay.


he is hanging out with us the whole date!
did she think other ppl were gonna hang out with us too and did i surprise her by showing up alone? or.. do i need to take a hint and just not really try anymore..

her brother and her have a real good relationship together. both christian. very loving family.
so, its common to see them together. but, after yesterday, i feel like moving on, but worried it might be a mistake.



ahh i let it out on the forums.. i didnt want to mess up the ^ < V game thread with it when someone asked me about it.
kspec is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:16 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Tallahassee, Boynton Beach, and Pensacola, FL
Posts: 12,565
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

That was me that asked, because I know this forum has some great people that can help you out (been there, done that).

Here's my thought:

She probably brought him for two reasons:
1) His approval. She wanted him to meet you, to see what you are all about, to make sure that you're a good guy and won't do her wrong.
2) Trust. You said that she says no to a lot of guys, and to be honest, I think she's waiting to meet the right guy. I bet she also brought the brother to test you, to see if you'd be bothered by it. If you stay around, it'll show that you aren't bothered by it, and that is definently a plus.

Stick it out, man, it'll prove that you are truly interested.

(I probably could have gone into more detail and explanation, but I'm distracted by my Jags playing on CBS, lol)
f4i kyle is offline  
post #3 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:18 PM Thread Starter
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 9,518
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

lol thx, that idea totally makes sense.

I was thinking she might not totally trust me yet. so its all good.

and yeah i thought it was you, but was to lazy to go back and look at the name, and i would probably mess up the numbers at the end anyway. lol.
kspec is offline  
post #4 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:21 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Tallahassee, Boynton Beach, and Pensacola, FL
Posts: 12,565
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

Haha.

But yeah, it's definently a trust issue. That is usually the hardest part for females to do, since they've either been screwed over too many times, or have never been in the position to begin with.

Have faith, man, it'll work out. Keep talking to her, and do anything possible to help. Don't be intimidated, and even try to befriend her bro. It'll show not just that you aren't afraid of him, but yet you are indeed a good guy.
f4i kyle is offline  
post #5 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:24 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: nb, canaduh
Posts: 10,276
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

dude,

okay, i'm gonna let you in on a secret and i'm pretty sure most women can back me up on this. women don't necessarily enjoy beating around the bush, so to speak.

ask her out and be clear that it is a date and that you're interested in her "you know, i'd really love to show you a good time. just the two of us...". or straight up tell her that you're interested in her and you'd like to possibly start up something with her and see where it goes. i mean, being cutesy and the initial "getting to know you" stage is cool. i like it, don't get me wrong. but it seems like you're either not being forward enough or you're not taking a hint. nobody's fault, really, but it seems like you two just don't know what each other's intentions are. it happens.

all you have to do is ask. she'll respond either affirmative or negative and then you can both stop wondering. there are, obviously, subtle things you can do to enhance your chances. and time + mood are obviously factors, but i'd just let her know how you feel before you get too invested in something that might not even pan out. then you can stop wondering.

after reading what oneill said, obviously trust is also a big concern but there are certain elements of trust that just can't be gotten to with a friend-friend relationship, and if she is worried about trust, well, she's either going to have to give you a chance or just tell you no.

i wish you big time luck, bro!

sig
biped is offline  
post #6 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:25 PM
Le Mans: Prototype Class
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Tampa Bay
Posts: 1,952
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

They're christian. Hardcore christians believe in chaperoning new couples. That might be part of it.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
cherry is offline  
post #7 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:28 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Allentown PA, USA
Posts: 6,851
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

Ditto here.... just keep at it. Let her know (by continuing to want to do things with her) that you're comfortable with her bringing the brother along. Also become friendly with him - that's a big help! You've made it this far, which seems much better than anyone else has done so far - so I bet you're in good shape! Let us know when the wedding is!



To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
zobx is offline  
post #8 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:36 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: nb, canaduh
Posts: 10,276
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

you must really like this chick because, quite honestly, this is a lot to put up with.

sig
biped is offline  
post #9 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:47 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: PA, USA
Posts: 5,896
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

[quote author=biped link=topic=65782.msg1127306#msg1127306 date=1167593799]
this is a lot to put up with.
[/quote]

No it's not ;-) Keep at it, kspec. That brother of hers needs to become a good friend of yours.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
3AndMe is offline  
post #10 of 26 (permalink) Old 12-31-2006, 02:51 PM
Grand Am Series
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Wolverhampton, West Midlands, England
Posts: 260
Re: totally embarressing but i got guts!

I'm a gender specific racist. I went out with a Chinese girl for 4.5 years, you can guess it didn't work out. One day I received a call from a heavily accented gentleman saying "you leave my daughter alone, I chop your fucking bollock off!". That was in the first 2 months. I became the invisible boyfriend, even sleeping in her house and hiding behind doors when parents came back... its fun. Her dad never met me as a her boyfriend, but once I got caught round hers while her cousins were visiting. Dad came back from the Takeaway to say hi to them and I was there... We pretended I was one of their mates from school and he served me lunch and shook my hand. If only he knew!

I hope Koreans are more accepting.

If the family are Christian I guess you won't experience this...


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
FluffyDucky is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

  FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs > Misc > Lounge

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome