Holiday eating tips - : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-14-2006, 11:06 AM Thread Starter
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Holiday eating tips

*disclaimer* I do not accept liabilty for anyone's actions due to over eating or over egg nogging.

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. it's rare. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-14-2006, 01:29 PM
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Re: Holiday eating tips

mmmmm rum balls... my favorite holiday cooking tradition.* it's usually make two or three balls, take a shot, repeat. by the time we're finished, they're not rum balls, they're rum blobs.

**not on this forum and not unless its in a for sale thread.
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-15-2006, 06:54 AM
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Location: Ellicott City, MD
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Re: Holiday eating tips

I prefer brandyballs.

1 (6 oz.) pkg. semi-sweet chocolate pieces (1 c.)
1 (5 oz.) can evaporated milk
2 1/2 c. crushed vanilla wafers
1 1/4 c. finely chopped pecans
1/2 c. sifted powdered sugar
1/4 c. brandy

In heavy saucepan combine chocolate pieces and evaporated milk. Cook and stir until chocolate melts. Remove from heat. Add wafers, 1/2 cup pecans, the sugar and brandy. Cover; chill for 1 hour. Form mixture into 3/4 inch balls. Roll in remaining pecans. Stores in refrigerator for 1 month. Makes 60 balls.

These things make we want to jizz on myself just a little bit. Them and thumb prints. I could post a generic thumb print recipe, but it just isn't as good as my great grandmother's recipe which I need to dig out in the next couple of days.

For christmas I am tasking myself with making thumbprints, brandy balls, and russian tea cakes. What sucks is I killed my hand mixer last night making sugar cookes, fried the motor. I really don't want to get another handmixer since I just got a kitchen aid mixer for my wedding...but I don't want to break that sucker out as my wife and I are buying a house and moving in the next 4-6 weeks and all the wedding gifts are still all nice and packed. I guess I have a lot of hand mixing to do...*sigh*
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 12-18-2006, 08:13 PM
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Re: Holiday eating tips

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