Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself. - FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #1 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:19 PM Thread Starter
Short Track Racer
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Chico, California
Posts: 121
Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.



Dear mildly attractive college student,

As I was checking out your Titanium gray Mazda3s sedan all the way down 5th Avenue, I thought to myself, "Hey! Cool people drive Mazda3's! I drive a Mazda3!" Much to my dismay, you were not all that cool. Your car was. Your Chico State license plate frame was. The way your Stubby antennae glistened in the sunlight was most definitely cool, and for a second, thought you might be a board member. (If you are, promptly identify yourself so I may issue an apology and offer dinner and a movie.)

Which leads me to writing this letter to you, mildly attractive college student. Your left turn onto The Esplanade from 5th Av., was daring, at the least. The Acura TL you cut off, undoubtedly a doctor returning from his affairs at the hospital at that very street corner, didn't look pleased. I'm sure he wasn't too offended, though, since the beauty of your economy automobile offset the traffic signal discrepancy.

Since The Esplanade is two lanes, I had my chance to catch up to you and see more than your vehicle's rump. However, on a thoroughfare where the speed limit is set at 25, travelling at mind-numbing speeds up to 50 is generally frowned upon by our local constable. I, however, took my chances in the name of all that is good and reasonable and caught you at the intersection at 1st Av. and The Esplanade. We exchanged glances, and I'm sure you didn't think twice because I was in the BMW. Little to your knowledge, we already had a common bond and were destined for MUCH more than just a simple traffic encounter. You drove that cute little Titanium Gray 3s with a Stubby like you stole the motherfucker. It wouldn't be out of line to assume that you, mildly attractive college student, do not shell out a few Washingtons on your car's behalf.

Quick! The light turned green! Onward for more of our journey southbound on the local boulevard. We proceed at normal speeds. I look in my sideview mirror and still like how a BMW and Mazda3 look next to each other. For I see this image every night in my own garage, but it never gets old.

Wait a tick, what is this? A flashing side marker? This generally indicates that one is considering changing la.... OH SHIT. *horn*

What is this nonsense, mildly attractive college student? You are now the reason I cannot kiss my mother with my filthy mouth. I should never have to scream "Dumb ho!" at another Mazda3. Ever! Blasphemy!

After your journey to the end of common sense and back, you turned right onto Lincoln Av., which, if the traffic coming straight at you didn't tip you off, is a one way street. That was the last I ever saw of you, my dear.

This disappoints me, mildly attractive college student. We had something special. We broke the law together all the way between 5th Av. and 1st Av. We probably would've gotten married, parked our 3's next to each other, and had little baby Mazda2's. Or something.

I suppose it was never meant to be.

Love,
Sky. (The moderately attractive, inappropriately dressed college boy in the convertible BMW..)

2005 Mazda3 SP23 4dr :: Carbon Gray, Saddle Brown :: six disc, moonroof :: slushbox :: sirius :: alum. fuel door :: #1731/3659.

The rest: 1987 BMW 325i Cabrio :: alpine white, natural tan int., black ragtop :: 2.5l I6 :: 16" BBS RK's :: Eberspacher exhaust :: Hella H4s :: 169k.
schuylerevans is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:29 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Iowa
Posts: 12,421
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

^^Nice letter. Sounds like a very bad driver in a new town..
mz3szoomzoom is offline  
post #3 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:34 PM
F1 Driver
 
chickmod's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Spring, TX
Posts: 8,626
Send a message via AIM to chickmod Send a message via Yahoo to chickmod
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

upload your pic to 3forums so we can all see it. loading to sprints site doesn't work.

2014 SR 3sGT
2015 DCB CX5GT
chickmod is offline  
post #4 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:35 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 23,673
Send a message via AIM to untouchable
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

Not bad at all.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
untouchable is offline  
post #5 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:40 PM
Le Mans: GT Class
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Yuckstown, Ohio
Posts: 660
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

very articulate. untouchable...who's the lady leaving butt prints on your hood?
5DoorFreak is offline  
post #6 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 08:47 PM
Le Mans: Prototype Class
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 1,261
Send a message via AIM to HairlessBeachApe Send a message via MSN to HairlessBeachApe Send a message via Yahoo to HairlessBeachApe
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

A nice tribute to someone that needs to park the car till they know what they are doing.

Untouchable, you need to answer these guys. This is the second thread someone has asked. I didn't have to the heart to tell them it was your sister.

Oh wait, I just did.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
HairlessBeachApe is offline  
post #7 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 10:35 PM Thread Starter
Short Track Racer
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Chico, California
Posts: 121
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

Picture taken care of.

And untouchable, you can just email me your sister's phone number. That'd be great. Thx.

2005 Mazda3 SP23 4dr :: Carbon Gray, Saddle Brown :: six disc, moonroof :: slushbox :: sirius :: alum. fuel door :: #1731/3659.

The rest: 1987 BMW 325i Cabrio :: alpine white, natural tan int., black ragtop :: 2.5l I6 :: 16" BBS RK's :: Eberspacher exhaust :: Hella H4s :: 169k.
schuylerevans is offline  
post #8 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 10:42 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Louisville, KY
Posts: 6,287
Send a message via AIM to cbogey88
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

Upon close examination of your story, I have concluded that this is unarguable evidence and further supports the theory that females were not blessed with the good driving gene.

Now get your beamer off our boards!!!!

Hehe, JK, glad she didn't hit you!!


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
cbogey88 is offline  
post #9 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 10:43 PM
F1 Driver
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Middletown, PA
Posts: 2,951
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

Yeah she's hot, I'd hit that! LOL!

2004-2010: '04 WB Mazda 3s Hatch
2010-Present: '06 GMC Envoy Denali Sport 4WD
Mello is offline  
post #10 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-23-2005, 10:53 PM
Le Mans: Prototype Class
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,284
Send a message via AIM to Lily Send a message via MSN to Lily Send a message via Yahoo to Lily
Re: Mazda3 performs objectionable traffic maneuver. Identify yourself.

THAT WAS A GREAT LETTER!!! If that was me i'd be too flattered to be offended (althought I must say, I would never drive like that!)


To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Lily is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

  FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs > Misc > Lounge

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome