I feel so dirty - FMVperformance.com : The site for all your Ford Mazda and Volvo needs
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post #1 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 04:32 AM Thread Starter
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I feel so dirty

Ack, I washed my girlfriend's Civic today.... It was in front of my Mazda3 too. I feel so dirty. Is that cheating?


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post #2 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 04:37 AM
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Re: I feel so dirty

What year Civic? Is it fixed up? Is it nice looking?


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post #3 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 04:46 AM Thread Starter
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Re: I feel so dirty

Let's see. It's an 02 I think, black. And it has some gay wind deflectors on the windows. Some half faded tint, and some of those lighted washer fluid things. Has some scratches and scrapes on it b/c she can't drive. Hasn't been waxed in its lifetime I don't think. Gosh, I feel like I had sex with a hooker.


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post #4 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 05:40 AM
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Re: I feel so dirty

ROTFL!! That's funny stuff. You're not cheating, don't worry.

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post #5 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 08:32 AM
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Re: I feel so dirty

[quote author=cbogey88 link=topic=26794.msg364559#msg364559 date=1123403542]
Ack, I washed my girlfriend's Civic today.... It was in front of my Mazda3 too. I feel so dirty. Is that cheating?
[/quote]

Nope, not cheating.
In fact, it's a good way to score some points....

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post #6 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 02:31 PM
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Re: I feel so dirty

i think you should die!!!!!!!!!!!!! why!!!! why would you touch that...... i cant go on....... i need a bath


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post #7 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 10:27 PM Thread Starter
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Re: I feel so dirty

lol, yeah. points indeed. she said "i owe you one." The meaning of "one" was never specified. im glad its not cheating. whew


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post #8 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-07-2005, 11:14 PM
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Re: I feel so dirty

As long as you get something good out of it you'll be fine, otherwise you'd been better off having sex with that hooker you mentioned, cleaner at least that way (not your gf, the civic).

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post #9 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-08-2005, 01:37 AM
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Re: I feel so dirty

Uh oh! Dude, you need to get yourself tested, ASAP:

Quote:
Originally Posted by "American Journal of Medicine"
Scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have disclosed a new class of diseases earlier this week. According to CDC officials, this new breed of highly contagious viruses are found dormant in many late model Honda Civics. These viruses are activated during car washes, and must find a human host within 2 hours after activation. Dubbed by scientists as Civic Transmitted Diseases (CTD's), the viruses pose a serious threat to humans immediately after activation. Those directly involved in washing an infected Civic are at the highest risk. To date, there is no treatment for these diseases. CDC lead scientist Joseph Morone stressed the importance of immediate quarantine in his public statement to the press on Friday. "CTD's exhibit symptoms similar to those of leprosy and seem to find their way from one host to another with alarming voracity", Morone said.

In addition to painful skin lesions and foaming at the mouth before death, symptoms of CTD's include:
  • A severe reduction in the length of the penis in men (a condition known as "micro penis&quot
  • Urges to write "Type-R" and "V-TECH" (a misspelling of VTEC) on everything
  • Ordering as many Altezzas and 5x2 spoilers as possible on E-bay
  • Lining house walls with flashing neon lights

Scientists urge the public to refrain from washing Honda Civics until more information can be gathered about CTD's. In response to the epidemic, president Bush is launching a campaign to hunt down and kill those infected with CTD's, claiming "contracting CTD's is an act of terrorism, and a threat to democracy". Plans are in progress to establish a new federal department for the control of CTD's, the Department of Homeland Civicurity. As a side note, President Bush himself took great pride in coming up with the new department name, celebrating the event over milk and cookies while wearing a Blue's Clues party hat.

Some CTD sufferers are finding hope at the Utah-based CTD Spiritual Wellness Camp. Camp organizer Lyndon LaRouche claims members are forced to find inner peace with their suffering through LaRouche's constant televised reminders that they are all destined to die very painful deaths very, very soon. LaRouche claims this prompts the members to become "one" with the disease at a personal level, allowing them to control the symptoms. "These dumb idiots.. err.. I mean, faithful supporters... are the cause of the rising epidemic", states LaRouche, "and only I know how to cure it!". Admission into LaRouche's camp is easy, made possible by his loyal followers. Infected persons can look for camp brochures and seek recruitment from LaRouche's personnel on the corners of every University campus nationwide. Most often, these highly trained and well informed experts will spot infected persons and approach them without invitation.

Others are finding relief by visiting their local Mazda dealer and spending time test-driving the vehicles. "I spend an hour a day test-driving every RX-8 on the lot", says Cindy-Lou Doyle, a 22-year old CTD sufferer, "and I'm feeling much better." Scientists are turning a watchful eye to Mazda, working with the engineers to uncover the promising therapeutic properties of Zoom-Zoom.
:shock:

Dirty, dirty Civics.


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post #10 of 19 (permalink) Old 08-08-2005, 01:19 PM
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Re: I feel so dirty

omigod that's funny

it's not cheating and sometimes you need to feel dirty in order to know how good you got it with your 3

I like cheese
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