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post #1 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-09-2003, 11:03 AM Thread Starter
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Jokes Post Good Jokes In Here

A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am. The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman from the assembly line throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire plant behind schedule.

The Personnel Manager decides that he should see this for himself so the two men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Elmo’s all over the floor and they're really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line stands the new employee. She has a roll of red plush fabric and a big bag of marbles. The men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to sew the little package between Elmo's legs.

The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches the woman. "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give each Elmo two test tickles."

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post #2 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-09-2003, 11:11 AM
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Tickle Me Elmo

LOL. I bet she was lovin her new job!!

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post #3 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-09-2003, 01:15 PM
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Tickle Me Elmo

LMAO!!! That is one of thte best jokes I've heard!

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post #4 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-09-2003, 02:57 PM
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Tickle Me Elmo

LOL... nice one.
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post #5 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-09-2003, 03:52 PM
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Tickle Me Elmo

Sweet.
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post #6 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-10-2003, 01:06 AM
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Tickle Me Elmo

ROFL!

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post #7 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-10-2003, 06:19 PM
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Tickle Me Elmo

LOL, nice find csweeney.

I know you're staring at that Red X avatar of mine
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hehehe

Sooo... when can *I* get a Mazda 3?
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post #8 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-10-2003, 09:28 PM Thread Starter
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Tickle Me Elmo

Thanks!

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post #9 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-10-2003, 09:32 PM Thread Starter
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Tickle Me Elmo

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from
her name plate that her name is Patricia Whack. So, he says, "Mrs.
Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long
vacation."

Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to
borrow. The frog says "$30,000." The teller asks his name and frog
says that his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that
it is OK, he knows the bank manager.

Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that
he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if
he has anything he can use as collateral. The frog says, "Sure, I
have this,"
and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall.
Bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the
manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and
says: "There is a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to
know you and wants to borrow $30,000 and he wants to use this as
collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant, "I mean, what the heck is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says:
"It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan.
His old man's a rolling stone."

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post #10 of 1655 (permalink) Old 12-10-2003, 10:47 PM
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Tickle Me Elmo

..........
oooooooooookay.... LOL

I know you're staring at that Red X avatar of mine
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hehehe

Sooo... when can *I* get a Mazda 3?
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